Weekly Update. . . IIX

Question 1) What have you done recently?  Oddly enough, I can actually answer this one whole-heartedly this time.  Last week, as we all know, I took the SAT last Saturday, and this morning, I forced myself out of a dreary haze to shower, eat, and then go to my school at 8 a.m. to take the ACT.  Which I probably bombed. I added two more parts to an ongoing story on my dA account [link] (feel free to browse), and a picture that I messed around with on Photoshop, which, surprisingly, isn't as popular as I thought it would be.  Oh, yeah, and I've been doing scholarships. (For anyone who has read any of these updates should have the general knowledge of how much I loath that, and if not [link] there you go. )

Question 2) What have you learned recently?  I have learned that I may probably not be the best influence when it comes down to certain. . . thingsss. . . but that's a whole other story.  One that will likely never be shared in good company.  So drop it.  Seriously.  I have recently come to learn to appreciate how much I will love not having to do a single thing my mother commands of me once I turn eighteen, (and god, how I await that day), and I learned in the past week or so that my band may or may not be getting another guitarist (which will change the lineup a bit, so we only have the two), and possibly a singer who can hopefully gore/grunge, whateverthehell you would like to call it.  Also, we're probably going to be somewhere around the heavy metal/ american heavy metal genre (bands like Slipknot and Lamb Of God).  Truly inspirational, truly.

Question 3)  What are you planning on next?  Killing myself if this goes on for much longer.

You Mean That Tingly Feeling I Get When I'm Overworked Is That Thing You Call Stress?

Yeah, unfortunately it is.  I know my mom experiences a lot of it with bills and what not, and all I can do is say "Mom. . . Chill out." Like, seriously.  Anyway, today I'm supposed to explain the difference between long and short term stress. Long term stress, I think one could easily correlate to having a boyfriend/girlfriend or significant other for a prolonged period of time; you get on each other's nerves, but still tell people "yeah, I still love him/her," when we all know the little grey hairs poking out are going to be re-dyed soon enough, and the next time we see you, we'll all be like "There's something different about you, but I can't quite put my finger on it. . ." (Hair colour is a completely different colour).  Whereas those are the long term aspects in a nutshell that I am certain anyone could relate to, directly through experience, or indirectly through movies, or having a friend or family member that tells you everything about it over the phone while you sit there on the other side pretending to listen going: "uh-huh. . . oh, yeah, that's interesting. . ." and the short term stresses are like sitting down, getting ready to type your blog and thinking to yourself: "I could totally go for a pb&j right now," and then getting up to go make yourself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I like mine with steak. And chicken. Hold the peanut butter. . . or the jelly. . . I call it a steak-and-chicken sandwich.  However, I could always go for a goodole fashioned manwich.

I'm also supposed to explain what I decided to do for my own stress relief.  Now, this just comes down to what kind of stress you're talking about.  School stress, I just ignore my homework and tell myself I'll get it done later, (which has resulted in me often not caring whether or not something gets done because if it doesn't, it'll only lead to more stress, so just not caring is the simplest solution), with stuff like the band, I just chill out because I know I've waited this long for it to get this far, so waiting is just about all I can do on that note.  Hrmnerm. . . Relationship stress, I can usually just talk to someone or just throw my phone across the house and forget it there to go watch the British Top Gear. But I haven't had to do that since January (can I get a hoo-rah!).  I think that's about all there is to cover.

System Update. . . VII?

Okay, I lost count of what week I was on, so what? And I forgot to do last weeks, so aside from being far from able to make that one up, I'm gonna just keep trollolo-ing along.
Q1) What have you completed recently?  I know this question is often a laugh for be, but every time I see it, it gets me thinking.  And I hate that about it.  There's just too much on my to-do list that I want to do and on the to-do list of things that I have to do, regardless, but that I put off anyway, like school work, and the stuff mother makes me do, like scholarships and collage.  The only reason I even get to my blogs is just because I sit at my computer, realize I deleted my Facebook account and have nothing else to do because my xbox is dead, the girl next door that I would normally ask if she wanted to hang out and go do something or play videogames with has moved across the country, the primary asset of the band lives way the hell out in Radium, and one of the other two sleeps until 5:00 (yes, P.M.) and then once he wakes up, he plays videogames on his beastly computer all day.  And the last member doesn't have a phone, and I don't like showing up to people's houses completely unexpected.  My lil sister hardly texts back, so I don't know if she's ever free or what's goin on there, and one of the only other people I'd ask only likes getting out of the house when it's with the best friend.  Sooo. . . yeah. . . In other news, I took my SAT for the second time yesterday, and I'm trying to figure out what to get a friend for her birthday party that's sometime today.  Only problem with that is: how does one get a gift for someone they hardly know? That's of the opposite gender, to throw that on top of all of it.  But when that's all said and done, and the time rolls about, I'm sure I'll have come up with something or other.

Q2)What have you learned recently? I have learned that I despise the fact that I am basically being forced to conform to this world by going to college.  Again, a story for another day and another time.  I have learned that the Hubbard's music store in this town is expensive as all hell, and I need a job next semester to be able to pay for my own dang stuff. . .  My guitarist is also going to apply with me so we can try to put more out of our own pockets to the band fund so we can get Ashley the double bass pedal, get ourselves the amps we need and hopefully some guitar stands, so we can stop using hampers. (Insert sigh here).  It's a sad day when one realizes how poor they are when they need so much to get started. . .  We also want to get a seven string, but if anything, that will come utmost last of all of our equipment, as long as we have everything for the time being to actually have practices.  Oh yeah! I also realized that the rest of this year is going to be so much of a pain that I could literally compare it to a pimple on the arse.  You know, like one of those ones that you get where it's there but also kind of not, because it's like under the skin, and you don't really realize that you have it until you scratch at it or something, and when you look to see why it hurts so much, you realize that it's one of those pimples? Yeah. . . like that. . . but on your butt. . . and in reality, instead of actually on you.

Q3) What are you planning on doing next? Well, I think I kind of technically outlined that one just a minute ago with the band and stuff. And like I have always said when it comes down to this question; it really honestly depends on what your asking about.  Today, being Sunday, of December 2nd, like I mentioned before, I get to go find a gift for someone I barely know, and attend her birthday party, hopefully not being the little outcast-emo-kid that sits in the corner because nobody else there is really into the same stuff that he's into and the only reason he's there is because she invited him, and, though he was grateful, he honestly didn't know what he was doing there and only really talks when she talks to him, and he's pretty sure the only reason she even talks to him in the first place is because he did a drawing of her that she liked.  Wish me luck! :D

 Probly could have done better.

Bwainzzzz. . .

The other day, I watched a video with woman who had experienced a rupturing of a blood vessel in her head; she detailed the account, how she felt during the entire thing, and how, when she finally realized what was happening, how she felt, and how she managed to get help.  The video started and I was thinking "okay, this should be interesting," but as it continued, I thought to myself "wow, this lady sounds like the highest hippie on planet earth."  Not to sound disrespectful of her or anything, it was interesting to hear of a neurologist's own personal account of what she felt during this and how she was unable to process things with 100% of her brain.  It almost reminded me of an H.P. Lovecraft moment, the way she explained how she couldn't quite comprehend things the way they were, and more like she was experiencing herself from the outside of her body, almost.  Which almost brings us to astral projection. But that's another story. ^-^

Speaking of astral projection. . .

Gotta love these guys. And for those of you who don't know what they're supposed to be, or what they're from. (link). There's the page, gives a bit of back-story to the whole thing, but you have to scroll down to the "combine overwatch" section for what I was trying to find.

Blog, Yada-yada, Whatever No. V

Q # 1) Accomplishments lately? I made it to Saturday night. 'Nuff said.

Q # 2) Learned anything? I have to write an essay Monday, and if I don't finish it, I'll have to do that Tuesday.  I've learned I don't understand the "who, what, where, when, why" of people, of their actions, of their responses, or their words, and I don't care.

Q # 4) So what's next?  What's left to be next? I don't know. I'm too tired to care.

Something, Something, Virtual Leeches, Something Something.

Today in my anatomy class, we did a lab with virtual leeches to test neurophysiologic connections.  It was, by far, the strangest lab (if it could be called that) to do thus far.  Basically cutting open a fake leech, zooming in on it's brain stem through a "microscope" and poking at it's brain-stem cells to see how it reacts to stimuli (i.e. hard, rough, or soft stimuli, or all three) to determine which kinds of cells detected which kinds of stimuli.  Stimuli never produced the same responses because the different kinds of cells pick up different types of stimuli in different ways.  I can only assume this is because of the way that each cell is built to react to whichever kinds of stimuli to feed to the organism to help it determine it's surroundings, whether it's in danger, etc. etc.  I believe the point of this lab was to see how neurological pathways detect a stimulus and to help us understand that there are different pathways for different amounts/types of external stimulus.

Remote, Please.

Today our Anatomy teacher showed us a video of a "remote control cockroach:" that is to say a roach that was controlled. . . via remote control. Yes, a "living, breathing" organism.  Though I am not sure what the exact mechanics of it are, my teacher explained that they took the "motherboard" out of a simple children's toy, rigged it to something glued to its back and fed the signals through it's antennae into its brain, telling it to move forward, backward, left or right.  Now, simple enough to say; this was, clearly, a science experiment for whatever level collage class and can be justified as such.  However, that is approximately where the fine line is drawn, the silver lining is made apparent in the clouds, and these things humanity clutches to as "morals."

I speak of this fine line where the moral conflicts for such a device come in because there are several points in which such a device can be implemented, not only in animals, but in the human species, for a greater "good" or "evil" if it is so to be put.  In the "greater good" scenario, it could be used to help make humanity take an extra little step towards the utopia it so wishes to achieve since the dawn of time and that David spoke of when he wrote the lines of scripture which take that picturesque vignette of humanity in the eyes of  Yahweh and place it into letters which the mind can vividly recreate all man's foremost "mother and father," (should one wish to believe that as the truth) in the image of the "LORD God [planting] a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed. . ." (Genesis 2:8).  What I am trying to reach, through all of this, is certainly not any conviction, but simply to introduce what man has wished to accomplish since he has heard the tale of the Garden; the Utopia he wishes to achieve for himself and all fellow man where no man shall fall ill, no man shall covet what his neighbor has, etc., etc.  The step I hint at leading toward this so-called utopia is that, if man can take hold of this technology, bring it about in a portable and convenient way so that one would not have to lug about a gigantic red rucksack everywhere with him, his paraplegic brother could stand and could walk about and run for the first time in years "since the accident," or even "for the first time in his life!"  Imagine it, reader; for the first time, those born with legs they could not make use of, or lost use at some point in their life, through an accomplishment of Man (O! the accomplishments he has made!) can utilize this technology to renew the signals that have been broken and renew them so that he may stand! Ponder this, reader; keep it in your mind while we explore other implications and before I dare delve into the moral implications that arise through our "modern" society."

Now, reader, let me take you into the opposite side of this silver lining; the more commonly apprehended version that the viewer takes (at least from my observations).  The question was asked, "Now, with this sort of technology, what could it be applied towards?"  Immediately, the first audible response from someone in the class was essentially "zombie apocalypse." Now. . . clearly, that is where our social media has taken us since Micheal Jackson's "Thriller" to the modern day sci-fi comic book series and AMC original series "The Walking Dead" but. . . I don't think that is quite where such a "mind controlling" device would lead.  If anything, anyone with the sort of power to control the minds, motions, or lives of a single person, or a million under a country, would certainly be devastating in the wrong hands to say the least, but what one must take into consideration, though the answer may be simple to some, is: why, exactly, would anyone wish to take up millions of lives as mindless slaves, or as use for entertainment? Or even the life of one in order to commit a misdeed?  Certainly, it is an entertaining thought, millions to have to bow down to one and do the bidding, yada yada, and surely there are some out there who would do evil merely "for the sake of evil" and nothing more, but what I fail to understand is what one could possibly get out of such an ability?

Of all things, since the beginning of man's ability to focus a train of thought, he has sought omnipotence, it is no mystery.  To this day, the desire to be god-like has driven every succession and every milestone across humanity.  Man wished to fly like the birds that a god or gods that were granted wings, and so he made himself fly.  Man wished to see the bottom of the deepest abyss to see where "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn" (H. P. Lovecraft The Call of Cthulhu), or as it translate for those of us who don't speak occult, "In his house at R'lyeh, dead Cthuluh waits sleeping."  And man dove to the farthest depths.  Man wished to travel past the heavens of earth and meet his god(s) and he sent himself to the moon.  In short, with the determination that the gods and myths inspire, Man reaches his pinnacle; then he looks even higher.  So. What, then, does this say, exactly, about this implement of "mind control," as we wish to put it?  It is a part of the next milestone, to say the least, but one that will, like every other, come at a cost.  Morality that modern beliefs have instilled provide the boundary line for man; when going far to achieve what he wishes to accomplish is going to far, and (approximately) when to draw that fine line.  Some of the moral arguments that arise remind me of the 2009 film "Surrogates" in which the world has become a sort of Utopia.  People live their lives comfortably from their home while their Surrogate, a robot which looks and operates exactly like a human can, without fear of pain, crimes, and consequences do not exist.  This film, I am sure, is a derivative of the Massively Multiplayer Online computer game Second Life.  In short, Second Life is a videogame with the same essential concept, allowing the players to enter a life where they can forget their current one and live anew however they please, meet new people, etc., etc.  (I think I will let Wikipedia do the explaining on that one.)  Regardless, the film "Surrogates" easily conceives the idea of the former mentioned "utopia" achieved with what is essentially the same mind-control idea and constructs a plot where humanity takes up the advantage of such a milestone and it is taken advantage of in the same such way one could consider when making the "cons" list of applying a device in humanity, regardless of being for the better.  Needless to say, the cons of such a list may outweigh the pros in understanding the application in a dangerous way, and for those of us with automatonophobia it is very easy to devise the end of all humanity through such a simple device that would allow the broken brethren to stand again and live with legs instead of wheels.

In conclusion, the morality of the current society would not allow for the application of such a device through much more than a cockroach  before current views and takes on where the moral line is drawn.  In short, the needs do not quite outweigh the efforts in development and will not be considered what the world is ready for until the world is ready to take the next step, whisper a new word, for the world is afraid of what is new and in order to overcome the fears, one must simply have the strength to pick up what lies before him and lead his brethren into The New Era. "The most ancient human being on the most ancient field would still be standing there, trying to discern a way to plant food and make a living. If one had not overstepped tradition and made an innovation then, the human race would still be standing there. We would not exist. Without innovation and efforts to survive, humans die" (Fyodor Dostoevsky, Crime and Punishment; Rodion Romonovich Raskolnikov's theory).